Preparation

Life has been pretty crazy the past few weeks. Lots of shopping and even more 'googling' the Florida Tallahassee Mission. My mom and I have most of my shopping done, thankfully. It was enjoyable until the last few trips where we were tired and stressed. (Fortunately we got chocolate on our last trip, so we managed to survive) I am so thankful to my mom and for all of the help she has given me. She answers all of my questions about mission life, the ones she can about the Temple (I go through on Wednesday!!), and numerous gospel questions that I hadn't thought about before. I really feel like I'm growing already. I'm studying more affectively, being active for more hours in the day and thus getting more done, and I'm spending more time with my family. It is hard to think that with the cross-over between Erek's mission and mine I won't see him for at least 3 years. Man, I'll miss that boy. I am scared out of my mind to go somewhere completely new with completely new people doing something I’ve never done before. I know that with the Lord’s help I can do this, but I’m still terrified.
I’ve come to realize that sacrifice is the secret to success. I have to sacrifice sleeping in for a good job and to prepare for my mission. When we fast we sacrifice food and water because we want blessings, or to show gratitude, more. When I sacrifice my time and money to go on a mission it is because I know that it is the Lord’s will. I will not let fear hold me back because my mission is worth sacrificing my comfort zone. This life is about giving up something we want for something we want more (ie: the natural man’s desires for living with Heavenly Father again). I don’t know if that makes much sense, but it is a pattern I have come to notice in my life.
I am so thankful for these experiences that I’m having. I am thankful for the opportunity I have to grow, and this time because of the good decisions I’m making rather than the consequence poor decisions made by others. I am thankful for the trials of my life because they have made me the person I am today. I have learned to rely on the Lord, to turn to Him through the scriptures and the Temple. I have learned to be more compassionate and to serve those in need. These are lessons I cherish and would not trade for anything. Yet, I am equally grateful that now I have to opportunity to further learn these lessons on my own. It is almost like before I was compelled to be humble and now I’m figuring out how to be humble on my own (emphasis on almost, I still have a long way to go).
Anyways, enough rambling. I’m really excited for all the things coming. I’m a little nervous to speak in church though (October 26th at 12:30) because while I bear my testimony all the time and have taught several lessons, I haven’t given a formal talk since I was 15 or 16. It is on the Plan of Salvation, so no matter how well I do, I will enjoy preparing for it and hopefully will be able to bring the Spirit.